Maharaji's Teachings about the Family - In His Own Words
Maharaji or Maharaji (meaning Ultimate Ruler) as he calls himself or gmj.htmlGuru Maharaj Ji as he called himself until the 1980's has no compunction stating he is a unique person with power possessed by nobody else alive. He declared himself the Lord of the Universe and the Perfect Master at the age of 8 and married at the age of 16 to a 23 year old, taller Californian woman. His drug taking, meat-eating and general playboy lifestyle caused his mother to disown and disinherit him. Despite having 4 children, a nice home and numerous cars and a very little work duties he still condemns normal family and romantic love as conditional and selfish and virtually all human lives as pointless, purposeless and meaningless suffering. For Maharaji only the love and devotion that people pay to him, and not the selfish love of others, has any value. Rawat taught that he was the real mother and father and his devotees sang daily in arti: "You are my mother and you are my father." He defined the devotees as the real family and they were encouraged to call each other brothers and sisters and to call Rawat's wife "Mom". Divine Light Mission produced a movie called Family of Love.
Of course Maharaji expects both his wife and children to kiss his feet in public so his ideas about family are very unusual if not downright illegal.
Maharaji's Birthday, 10th December, 1971, Prem Nagar Ashram, India.
And all the human beings that have been created and are living in this world, or on any other planet, have to be united in one cord, only one cord. This cord is of love, and that perfect love is only given by the Perfect Master of the time. No one else is able to give that love to you. You think that your wife, your husband, your children will give you love? No. It is the love of selfishness. Baby loves mother because mother gives milk, not because they have a connection. No. Just because of selfish love. In the same way, you love everything because of selfishness. But we love guru without any selfishness. It is pure and perfect love, it is that love which cannot be disturbed by mind at all. So be perfect, be in love, do meditation, run smoothly, have a good life, enjoy yourself, be one with Him who has created you, who had created you and who will create you. Because this is what you have to find in the world.
Who Is Guru Maharaj Ji?, 1973
Prem Nagar Ashram, Hardwar, India, December 11, 1971
"You think that your wife, your husband, your children will give you love? No. It is the love of selfishness. Baby loves mother because mother gives him milk, but not because they have a connection. No, just because of selfish love. In the same way, you love everything because of selfishness. But you love guru without selfishness. It is pure and perfect love; it is that love which cannot be disturbed by mind at all."
Reflections on an Indian Sunrise (1973), p. 28.
Delhi, India, December 1972
Man is supposed to be human, but actually he has lost his humanity. That's why there is so much frustration, so much jealousy, and so much hatred between human beings. We have started this mission and it's working very, very successfully distributing love, truth and peace so that the idea of brotherhood can come into the world. All the saints have been trying to give something to people so that they might be in perfect union with God. Jesus came and He gave something. He gave the lesson of love, but He didn't only speak of love, He gave something that put people into love. I am doing the same thing now, giving something to people so that they might be in complete love, so that they might be in the true love which flows towards God rather than the love which flows towards materialism. The love which flows towards materialism is very limited because all materialistic things are limited.
And It Is Divine, Volume I, Number 5, March, 1973
Phipps Auditorium, Denver Colorado, 2nd May 1974
Because really in this life, nothing means to me, nothing nor my brothers, nor Mata Ji. I'm telling you this. I might as be, I might as well be frank with you. Nothing means nothing to me. Because there is Grace. And if there wouldn't have been Grace, I tell you, I wouldn't even, even be born. And then, what does it matter? And I respect them all, because they should be respected. They are respectable, they should be respected. They have a, they are the way they are, the point, the place they are, they should be respected. I love Mata Ji and I respect her. Because it has, she has been the source. But so far that particular love is concerned, I can't. Because I can only give it to one person, and that's Guru Maharaj Ji. Because I could have been born and been confused all my lifetime and there are so many people born who can be confused all their lifetime and they are confused all their lifetime but then there is somebody because getting born, having brothers or sisters or none of them, eating, drinking, walking, sleeping, all this is a very natural thing, this happens but there is one thing which is most important in a being's life, which is most most most most utmost important, is Guru Maharaj Ji because He can do, He can take him, can give him a new birth, take, He can take him out and put him into a place which is the most beautiful and we have to re understand. First, we have to understand Knowledge to understand who is Guru Maharaj Ji. And to understand Knowledge, you have to do meditation, you have to do satsang, you have to do service. Today um this is I think it's really funny. I don't know if it's that funny or not. But um somebody called, one sister called, and I happened to pick the phone up and uh she was talking, I didn't get the few parts of it but uh she said that, "Why can't we all be a family?" I said, "Look, we already are." The day we received Knowledge, and the day we started meditating on it, we all become a family. A giant, giant family, a big huge family and we are all a family.
Perfect Master Tape 014
Letter From Maharaji To All Premies - 9 May 1974
"This is a very important letter. have in the past few months experienced that a lot of premies have faced a problem of different agyas from different sources. This has even confused a lot of premies. I don't like this at all. I would like that all premies understand that no matter which member of holy family gives agya, no action should be taken unless that has been confirmed with me. I hope that all premies understand this, for there is really One Source of agya, to Whom we have dedicated our lives and by Whose Grace we have been able to realize this most beautiful Knowledge."
Divine Times, June 1974 Volume 3, Issue 1
Guru Puja '74, Copenhagen Denmark, July 4 1974
And I understand there are going to be many more programs, because really you know we are a big family. And I don't think anybody should have any objection if a family meets together. And that's what we are. If some people are having any objection, maybe they are a little cuckoo. Because we are a big family and we say that, I mean we say that out loud. This is what we are. We meet together, so we can enjoy that thing that has been given to us, that thread which has sewn us together, this Knowledge. … And so premies, do a lot of meditation, a lot of satsang, a lot of service, so that you can really become strong and so that we can give this whole world ??? and make this whole world a family.
he Golden Age Number 10, August 3 - 16, 1974
Guru Puja '74, July 7 1974
I mean, of course, that's where the misunderstanding came between my family. Because people were not understanding, my family was not understanding what I am trying to do here. To them, it was just like another thing which should have happened. But no. I was trying to get something more beautiful together. … The thing is, it's going to grow. It's going to be so beautiful, you know, and we have to understand that we are all a big family now. Like, if somebody asks, "Well, why are you doing that?" All you can say to them is, "Listen. This is a big family. And if a family does something, you mind your own business." We are a big family. It's like, we are a big garland. And we have been sewn together by this thread of love which everybody dreams of. This is what we have to understand, and really go ahead, and really try to meditate, and really try to do satsang.
And It Is Divine, August 1974, Volume 2, Issue 3 and Perfect Master Tape #21
Holi Festival, Miami Florida, March 29 1975
You see, it just so happens that every human being has a quest to know, has a feeling inside of him to know that which is completely unknown, that which has never been revealed before, that which cannot be told, that which is completely not perceivable by his human body. Now that can be anywhere from A to Z. It can be love. Because what mankind in these days experiences as love is not true love. It is something else. And that true love he has never seen before, he has never felt before, he has never touched before. That which he wants to know could be love.
And It Is Divine - Volume 2, Number 9, June 1975
Jhumri Taliaya, Bihar, India, April 15, 1975
But the strangest thing that is supposed to happen in Kali Yuga has now happened. We used to be criticized from all directions, but now the criticism is coming from our own people, who we used to call our very own. What does this show us? This shows us that this person, this Perfect Master, who comes to propagate this Knowledge is completely unattached. Until recently Bal Bhagwan often tried to explain to everybody that I am completely unattached, that I am not dependent on my mother or my brother, that if somebody is my mother she is just my mother, and if somebody is my brother he is just my brother; but now it has been proven. And now for God knows how many ages, people will think of this and realize that yes, it is true that the reason the Perfect Master comes to the earth is not for the sake of his mother, or brother, or family, but only to spread the Knowledge.
And It is Divine, Volume III, Issue 4
London, England on September 10, 1975
And it is my duty, it is my job to make sure that at one point all of us, all of this family, does get together, does experience, and does merge into that most beautiful experience that we all want to feel, that we all really want to understand. So premies, this is the time when we all have to rise to a point, to a consciousness, to a stage, where mind does not affect us anymore. … To make it manifest properly amongst all of us, to really be in a family, and really experience that love, you are responsible for it. Every single one of you, individually, as a matter of fact, are responsible for that. … So we can be that family; we can be in that love. But it needs your cooperation, because it's happening for you. You are also going to be part of it. … Now we are here, and I want all the premies to really take that pledge to help me make this cake so that it can be equally distributed amongst all the premies, so that we can have one very big, beautiful, understanding family. This pledge is something that all of you premies have to take. This is the pledge that has to be taken by you.
Divine Times - Volume 4, Number 9, November 8, 1975
Stockholm, Sweden, 30 May, 1976
People sometimes do end up with a nice car and do end up with a nice house, which is supposedly an ultimate dream of any person - a nice wife, a nice house, a nice family, and a nice, nice, nice paying job. They think that they're got it made, that that's it, and then they drive around in a Cadillac. That's what happens to people. Some people get to that point because they work so hard, they really, really work so hard, they're really dedicated. You know, I'm not criticizing the fact of having a car and a nice house and a nice family. That's okay. But then the person turns around and kids himself. He tells himself a lie, and he says, "I'm happy." When someone comes up to him and says, "Are you happy?" he says, "Yeah, I'm happy. I'm fine, I'm in great shape." That's what he keeps telling everybody, "I'm fine, I'm happy, I'm happy, I'm happy, I'm happy." It's so strange because sometimes I've talked to people and I ask them, "Are you happy?" and they say, "Ya, ya, ya, I'm happy." But if you just pose one more little question to them, "Do you really think you're happy?" they completely turn all red, almost violet, and say, "Yes, I am! What do you mean, do I know if I'm happy or not?" But they are really not happy; they're just trying to cover up something and when somebody starts lifting the covers from it, they get completely mad, they get completely violent.
he Golden Age Number 33, October 1976
Denver Colorado, September 11 1976
This is all a family. We are all here for one reason. Let us not forget that. Let us not forget our primary, fundamental reason. Whoever we are, we are not all from Canada, we are not all from America, we are all different, we all have different backgrounds; as individuals we are all different. Coming together in this place, we share one thing in common.
Divine Times, October 1976 Volume 5, Number 9
Atlantic City New Jersey, December 18 1976
So anyway, I'm here, and it's really beautiful to be here. We're just a great old huge family, and we have to just get big enough places together so the whole family can meet - like a family reunion, but the only problem is that this family, we don't have disputes and confusions between us, that we shouldn't meet because of that. We are all understanding the same thing and we are proceeding towards the same path, so it's always very blissful to come together. We don't have to sit down and talk about the crazy garbage, but we can sit here and talk about love and understanding, which is really true, and the truth. That's the whole name of the game: understanding the love, the beauty of this realization that we have.
And It Is Divine Magazine, Spring 1977, Volume 4, Issue 1
Hans Jayanti Festival, Kissimmee, Florida, November 9, 1978
And this is what I am saying: The people of this world who have not experienced this Knowledge, the happiness provided by this Knowledge, have really no right whatsoever to say that what their situation is, they are happy in it. How do they know? What is there to counter it? What is there to provide the two parallels with? What is so definite that they have experienced that they know what they are seeing, what they are feeling, is happiness. You know, a lot of people, to them their family is their happiness. I've a very wonderful wife you know, very beautiful - and kids, incredible. And you would say, okay, well isn't that providing you happiness? And I can say "Yes and no." And it's true. Yes, it provides me happiness, but I know that that happiness that that provides me is not the true happiness. So, no. It doesn't really provide me the happiness that you are talking about, because I know that that happiness that we are really all looking for, that makes us smile inside - that really, really makes us smile inside …
The Golden Age December 1978 Number 50
Holi, Miami Florida, April 8, 1979
And so that is why that faith in Guru Maharaj Ji, that love for Guru Maharaj Ji, has to be real. Because Guru Maharaj Ji's love for you is real. Give me any reason for anybody in this hall why Guru Maharaj Ji should love them. As far as Premlata is concerned, as far as Daya is concerned, as far as Hansi is concerned, they call me "Daddy" and that's what I am. I'm not their Guru Maharaj Ji yet. They're my children and maybe they are here and they love me and so on and so forth. But that's a worldly relation. That is about as good of a relationship that if I upset them, then it's like, "Okay Daddy, ciao. Good-bye."
Divine Times, May/June 1979 Volume 8, Number 3
Marbella, Spain, 29 April 1979
Because who in this world, who wants us? Who in this world wants us for keeps? Maybe when we are little our father says, "Oh I love you, I want you". What is his ambition ? He wants to teach you. It's an investment," he says, "it's an investment. So that when I retire you shall be able to work and feed me and your mother." A concept. Who wants us for keeps ? Nobody in this world wants us, really. Nobody. Our father doesn't want us, our mother doesn't want us, our brothers don't want us, our uncles don't want us, our aunt doesn't want us, nobody wants us in this world. Except Guru Maharaj Ji. Guru Maharaj Ji's the only one who says, "come, come now and you can stay forever". Guru Maharaj Ji is the one who says, "You don't have to ever leave. You are home. You can stay at home as long as you want." And that's the kind of opportunity, that's the kind of Grace, that sometimes we kick right in the face. So premies, we just have to surrender now. Now is the time.
Divine Light Mission magazine unknown
Albert Hall, London, 28th May 1979
The same way with that love, with that experience of Truth, we don't know it's there. To us the experience is when we fall in love. Fall in love, that's it. That's the love we are looking for. No, it's not. You might be in love but it only takes nothing, almost nothing, to just disrupt it, make it disappear, make it vanish. It's that true love, that real love, that is not based upon a bunch of promises that we need. People go into church: "Will you take this person to be your lawful, wedded wife, in this world and the other world and to always cherish and to hold?" and all that. And OK I've been through that and, yes, it is wonderful. It's very beautiful - you look into your wife's eyes and you really feel that love and it's so different. Watch it, that's not love, that's just an emotion of being married to somebody that you like. That's not love. Love is obviously something different. And when that love really comes to us, no emotions need to be there. Because when that love is so real, why does it have to have a proof? Do you think we would cry? It doesn't matter. When somebody dies, you literally have to cry. If you don't … True love is beyond all that. True love is real. It needs no proof. You don't have to laugh, you don't have to cry and you don't have to dance. You don't have to dance to show that you're happy, and you don't have to smile to show that you're happy. And you don't have to sing and you don't have to do anything; but people can see it. Because there is that feeling of fulfilment.And yet when there is that fulfilment, when there is that real Knowledge, when there is that real love, it's so much different, it's so much truer. The love between a devotee and his Guru Maharaj Ji is so incredible because there is a fulfilment and the love comes from fulfilment, not emptiness. Love there flows naturally, not as a substitute. To us, to a lot of us, love is to substitute that misery.
Light Reading, 1980 and The Golden Age, Special Introductory Issue Number 1, February 1980
Guru Puja 1979
"Because Guru Maharaj Ji can show that to us now in this lifetime while we are still alive. Guru Maharaj Ji can give us that love, Guru Maharaj Ji can give us that realisation now. We have to just let go to Guru Maharaj Ji, give ourselves to Guru Maharaj Ji, not in a theory, not in a song, not in an Arti that we sing every night. I give you my heart, for in you it will mellow, Maharaji my Lord, my life is your play. I mean those are pretty heavy duty statements, you know. You are my mother, you are my father. What, what, what are we saying? And yet do we even have an essence of meaning to it? What we sing is right, it's true, it is an expression of a devotee. This is what a devotee would understand of his Guru Maharaj Ji. That you are my all, he doesn't have to go into specifics about your brother, sister, mother, father, cousin, uncle, aunt. And yet in a very humble and beautiful way we are trying to express that you are my all, every relations, you are my all, you are above and beyond. You know, and really the whole essence of prayer is let me really give myself to you, (the song "Always There" joins in the soundtrack) let me surrender to you, you have come singing the glories of Guru Maharaj Ji is what Arti is all about. Oh Guru Maharaj Ji you are my father, you are my mother, you are friend. I see you in those respect, you need to teach me a lesson, you need to give me the fathering, you need to give me that mothering, you need to give me that support and yet you are my all, my Lord to me."
Guru Puja 1979 DLM video
Hans Jayanti, Kissimmee, Florida, November 8 1979, Evening
"In sickness and in health, for richer or poorer and …" I don't know what-all they say. All the things. And then comes that time when it's, "I hate your guts. Get out of the house. I hate you. You're terrible." Maybe that thing starts to happen in people's lives, like I was talking about that day: a clay mask, rollers in the hair, biting of the nails. All the things getting on each other's nerves. Husband leaves his clothes all over the place and the wife complains about it and the wife leaves her things all over the place and the husband complains about it. All that love only lasts till the honeymoon is over. After that, it's all finished and gone. What people don't do to try to get that love back in their lives! But because that's not even true love … You like a person or whatever. You want to be a companion. That's one thing. But calling it true love and sincere love - because that's one thing it isn't: true and sincere love. How can it be true and sincere love? If you have true and sincere love, it won't even flow towards another being unless it's Guru Maharaj Ji. If it's Guru Maharaj Ji, then that true and sincere love can really flow out of you, from you, from deep within you.
Élan Vital, Volume IV, Issue 1, Spring 1980
Cancun, Mexico, January 16, 1980
I mean, look at my children. I love them and it's beautiful. But is that really…? I know that I can't give my sincere love to them because that sincere love, that really sincere love, has already been dedicated to Guru Maharaj Ji. And that's the only thing I can be sincere about. That's the only real thing I can be sincere about. I mean, I hope not, but tomorrow they could come up to me and say "Ciao, pops," which happens to so many people. Then what do you do? What do you hold on to? What is there to hold on to? But the true sincere love, that sincere love, that love that's not because of a reason, that devotion where that love is so sincere - so sincere that it changes its name from love to devotion. I cannot give my devotion to anything else in this world except to my Guru Maharaj Ji, because it's sincere. I cannot have an expectation. What can I expect? That's where I have to learn humility. That's why I have to be humble. I need not be humble anywhere else in this world but I need to be humble when I stand at my Guru Maharaj Ji's Feet.
Affinity, June 1980
Rome Italy, 1st November 1981
Guru Maharaj Ji says "Come with me and I'll show you the garden, I'll show you that life, I'll show you the creation. The creation you've never even seen before. I will show you that love, the love that's limitless. The love that's endless. The love that is not bound by time. The love that is full of grace. A love that is present. A love that's all encompassing." What is there in this world like that? We chase around in this world but what is in this world that can give us that? The real love. The love between two people, the greatest love between two people, makes uh Romeo and Juliet look like amateurs. … That's miserable love. Who needs love like that? People get, people got killed in that love. They were miserable for the whole their lives, specially when they started that love and yet is that the same love that Guru Maharaj Ji offers? No, completely different. Joy from the very first day, bliss, happiness from the very first day. … The hatred that one human being has for another isn't going down by any means. And yet Guru Maharaj Ji and the I know on one hand this world is offering us on a platter you know the hate, the fear, jealousy, anger, suspicion, ego, all the nice candies. And on the other hand Guru Maharaj Ji is offering us the love, the joy, the truth, the bliss, the harmony, the light, cause he has it, he has it to offer, he has it to offer to everybody, it fills them up.
Élan Vital 'Rome 1st November, 1981' video
Public Program, Wembley England, 20th April 1988
Love your family, families are great, I have one, four kids, wife, house, two dogs, the works. What I don't have is a station wagon but the rest I do have both families, let's face it, can be very trying. You wake up in the morning or sometimes what happens that I've been on a tour and I come home and I'm very tired, I'm trying to sleep and the youngest one he has decided that day that he doesn't want to go to school. … It's very tough, it's very tough and it's like you're constantly in this, in this position with your family and you have to give to everyone what ever it is that they are looking for from you.
Élan Vital video
Shri Sant Yogashram, New Delhi, Hans Jayanti celebrations, November 9 1990
And this has to be borne in mind by everyone of us that if you want to have fulfillment in this life then you should begin with this Knowledge. You should be more particular about attaining the supreme happiness for your ownself and not too much concerned about your family, about the welfare of your family.
'Life Force', Volume 7, Issue 2 April-June 1991
TPRF 2005 CD, Track 2
We appease and work on appeasing so many in our family. We have our children, we have our relatives and, you know, that's a function we have to do, appease them. And if we do it right, perhaps they will try to appease us. It's a trade, (embarrassed laughter) let me scratch your back, maybe one day you'll scratch my back.
TPRF 2005 CD, Track 2
Mom: You and I are one, we're one heart living our Lord and now He's joined us together in Him. I know this because I feel it so deeply and I know Guru Maharaj Ji loves you so much, more than I could ever, ever tell you and also in this marriage He's made me your new mother. And even though I'm a new mother. I I really don't know how to be your mother. But it's the child, the children that make a mother, a mother.